Getting Divorced

It is said that the three most things likely to make you loose your mental

ability is Getting Divorced, Moving Home, or Loosing Your Health. Lets not forget loosing your job so that makes it four.

Well getting divorce is bad enough if you have been in a long term situation like almost 27yrs. But what if you, also lost your health, and lost your home as well as your job because you had the courage enough to say there has got to be a better life out there and you are determined to get it.

That is my story, due to spinal injury, it became impossible to do any day jobs.

The marriage was not existing anymore, we lead separate lives living under the same roof. It was perfect for a while but became unbearable when I could no longer keep even a few hours work away from home. Working on my home works was not acceptable to my other half so I had to take a low profile.

Finally I decided there has got to be a better way especially as I was getting so bad it was too painful to carry out any house chores due to the progress of my medical condition. Though we were not being husband and wife neither one of us had any plans for a divorce. I just woke up one day and decided I need to move on. So I announced stupidly without any preparations. What a Bomb Shell. Well water under the bridge now but I can not express in words how foolish I feel or felt.

That said there is no going back I look forward to the day when everything will be settled and I can say I am finally divorced. Its over 2yrs now and I have not even got my decree Nisei because I have not even gone passed the Petition. For a divorce that is not being contested officially only God knows when.

It is tyring but i am happy to say that it was a good decision, there were times that I had my doubts if I could cope with this chronic pain and the stress of the situation. I am happier than I have ever been in the last ten years since my injury. Truth be know my injury 11yrs ago put a strain on my circumstance.

Not everybody knows how to take care of the person that has been taking care of them, when the roles has to be reversed due to unprecedented circumstances. I rest my case.  It is very important to do your home work about how much, your assets are worth, where they are, how to get your shares out and where certain papers are. Don't think of how things are between you because once bitterness sets in you can be left at the mercy of your other half until the courts have made a ruling.

16th/Feb/2009

Talk about being tried in life Daddy finally passed away yesterday -

With sadness in my heart I record that my dearest Dad passed away yesterday morning.(15/02/2009) Seth Kofi Stsofia RIP you will be missed by all your

loved ones friends, relatives and acquaintances. You were a great man.

your memory lives on. I thank God I managed to get even closer to you

despite being abroad. Thanks to mobile phones I had a good relation and happy to say there is nothing outstanding that I did not get to address before your departure. I will miss your absence dearly but I am relieved you are no longer in pain and resting peacefully. I will aways love you Daddy till we meet again. RIP SETH KOFI SETSOFIA.